Today is my sister Anne’s birthday.  I want to send her best wishes and blessings and so very much love on this day.   

Anne is my younger sister.   She has beautiful blue eyes and a great smile.  Anne loves making other people happy.   She’s created a beautiful home and she loves welcoming people to her home.  She enjoys cooking and making healthy, delicious food for others.   

Anne has the most wonderful laugh.  She’s a happy person.  Her husband Tom is a remarkable individual.  They are so devoted to each other.  They fell in love in high school.  They are soulmates.  I only know a few couples whom I would say are perfect for each other.  Anne and Tom are perfect for each other.  They live in a beautiful neighborhood on the gulf coast of Florida.  Each day love to take walks together.

They have two beautiful children: Michael and Allison, who are wonderful and loving.

Anne and I have not spoken in quite a few years.   And that’s my fault.  I have a tragic ability for hurting people that I care so much about.  Years of therapy and degrees in psychology still aren’t enough to explain how I’ve managed to hurt people to the point of their walking out the door and never looking back.

Maybe it was me who walked out the door.  I’m not really sure.  I just know there are people who are no longer in my life.  But they are still in my heart.

I am truly sorry for having caused great pain to others. 

On a day like this I think of Anne and how much I love her and miss her.   How I wish to God that I could make things better… how I wish I could make things better with so many people whom I have pushed away.

I suppose there are things that aren’t possible.  Sometimes the damage is irreparable; the bridge is completely gone.

I apologize to you Anne and to all who have given me so much.  You loved me and I wounded you.

I am truly sorry.  I wish things were different.

I remember once when we were kids, it was your birthday and we were all at the dining room table. The candles were all lit on the beautiful cake Mom had made.  We were all singing Happy Birthday and you had the biggest smile on your face.  Then, you paused before blowing out the candles.  I wonder what you wished. 

I wonder if wishes still come true.

Happy birthday Anne.